I Once Thought About Encasing My Master Password

In a password-protected case, but I couldn't think of a secure enough password for it. And then I thought : "obviously I should just use my master password. If I can get in, then I know what it is, so why would I try to get in?"

I think the underlying logic of this needs to be expanded upon.

- g-spot -

A Mixture Of Dead Things

Dinner.

Sorry, did you think I meant something else?

- g-spot -

The Secret Motivation of the Anti-Smoking Activist

They don't care if you smoke or not. They don't care if you drop dead from cancer or not. They certainly don't give a rat's ass if second-hand smoke kills, maims, disables, or even improves the quality of life of, anyone or anything. Or not.

They have another purpose.

Anti-smoking activists are really just secret government lackeys on a mission to identify, in the general population, "who is it that can be convinced to do something they don't want to do", and "who says 'Fuck you!' to the Establishment and abuses themselves to death as an act of resistance?"

The answers to these two questions could be worth alot, to alot of people.

- g-spot -

P.S. My advice to my smoker friends : sign up for, and drop out of half-way through, every "Quit Smoking" course you can find. Frequently, but on a random basis. Stir the statistics pot, citizen, you have the power!

The-Not-Ready-For-Blog-Rant-Players, Volume 4

The Definition Of Law In The Modern World

Rules about rules about rules.

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Album Title : Izwutitiz

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My Thoughts On The 40+ Crowd

We're getting creepier.
And more hopeless. Definitely more hopeless.

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The only time jerking off doesn't feel better, over-all, than actual sex, Is during actual sex. I think that's pretty much the key to the kingdom right there.

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I don't have enough sense of outrage to be a good musician
And I don't have enough sense of commitment to be a good person.

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I Just Spent 15 Hours Copying 40 Gigabytes

And then I discovered I had the hard drive plugged into the "slow" USB port instead of the "fast" one. On a $4,000 computer, why is there a slow fucking ANYTHING!?!?

- g-spot -

Communication Methods Of The Schizophrenic

Think about it. Human beings seem driven to invent new methods of communicating
LESS efficiently with each new generation, but with an interesting side trip each time.

Observe :

- first there was talking. Pretty immediate, extremely efficient.
- then distance forced on us the telegram. Less efficient, but really the only way.
- then the telephone brought us back to talking. Hooray for the telephone!
- then we started writing things down and sending them BY telephone (i.e. faxing).
- then email... wonder of wonders! Almost like instant faxing!
- then cell phones... back to talking! And from anywhere, anytime!
- then text messaging... back to writing and sending it, this time by the most inefficient method ever conceived!

What is this drive we have to bring ourselves closer together and then immediately separate us as much as possible?

Sounds like sex to me.

- g-spot -

I've Got This Fortune Cookie Widget in the Mac Dashboard

Normally, it's pretty innocuous stuff, what you'd expect from a fortune cookie.

This time, it said (paraphrased) : "Giving to the poor only ensures their poverty".

I translate this as : "Survival of the fittest, asshole! If you've got enough balls to sit outside in the freezing cold and beg for change, go get some low-rent sales job... same difference, only 10 times the dough. What?!? I'm supposed to give you money because you choose to freeze your ass off? Christ, if only my job were that easy!"

And on and on.

Okay, so here's what you do : pick one guy on the street who you want to be guardian angel to; give him $2 the first day, but nothing to anyone else. Then after a week, make it a loonie and a toonie. After that, just escalate it a dollar a day and you know what? In no time, you've got your very own slave for just $30 / month!

[ Sorry, I seem to have taken a Turning-of-the-Worms-esque sidestep there for a second... I'm okay now. ]

- g-spot -

There Are Alot Of Bad People Who Do Bad Things

But they're never charged, never prosecuted. Because they're not stupid.
The only guys you ever hear about, the ones behind bars, are not there because they're bad, but because they're stupid.

If all of sudden ALL of the clever people realized this, we'd be in some serious shit!

- g-spot -

Paradise By The Beer Tap Light

So my bestest buddy Spooge and I were doing what we normally do after getting our asses kicked at video trivia, which is kicking each other's ass at pool, at the Paradise Billiard Hall (a misnomer if there ever was one).

This place is your typical divey dive, known less for its quality of table, decor or bill of fare, than for the size of its barmaids' breasts. Sort of "Hooters" on the cheap.

As I pondered the wonder of our server's heaving bosom, I had to stop and think: WHY do I care about her heaving bosom anyway?

I think it's for the same reason Bugs Bunny loves carrots.

- g-spot -

The Only People You'll Hear The Phrase "You Can't Take Criticism" From...

Are critics.

My advice?

"Do something instead of talking about doing something. You'll be worth listening to after that."

- g-spot -

The Database System Dichotomy

It's about trust.

There is so much terrible, unreliably crap out there that
People assume from the start won't work, or will fail unexpectedly,
They get used to not trusting anything,
Especially something they're using for the first time.

And then they use one of my systems.

Suddenly, their mistrust deepens. They become visibly agitated.
Something is terribly, terribly wrong...

"It's been 45 minutes and this fucking thing hasn't broken down yet,
Or made me want to reach down my own throat and pull out my heart...
There must be something SERIOUSLY fucked up coming down the pipe!"

The burden of competence is a heavy one.

- g-spot -